Photography: an exciting meeting that captures the heat of the moment. With new devices like the iPhone taking the world by storm, many have asked me "how to take bomb-ass ratchet pictures." I, as a fellow photographer, have mastered the ratchet art of iPhonegraphy.
First, the prospective photographer must embrace his or her inner white girl. As no other ethnicity or gender takes myriad photographs, the person must channel their "inner white girl." After effectively channeling his or her inner white girl, next the photographer must locate an iPhone, or a camera device of similar nature.
Once said device is located, open the camera app. Click the top right-hand button to turn the inner camera lens (rather than the other, non-ratchet outer one) on. After the lens is turned on, take 3-5 shots (depending on weight; the lighter you are, the more shots you take) of crappy Trader Joes six dollar Cupcake vodka.
Now, wait 12 minutes. You have very little time before you vomit, so quickly snap photos of duck face and other fab poses. After, proceed to vomit.
Once you have finished vomiting, post all photos to Facebook with a witty but annoying album title. You are now a successful ratchet-ass photographer! Good job!
-Mackenzie Cosgrove
Mackenzie Perkins Photography
